Not My Problem

Found on Etsy. What the shit? My dad’s a dentist, so if...

Fri, 18 Dec 2009 00:25:21 -0600

Found on Etsy.

What the shit? My dad’s a dentist, so if you want some for a cheaper price, let me know.

Etsy has some weird shit. Not my problem.

100 Weirdest stories of 2009

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 22:35:00 -0600

100 Weirdest stories of 2009:

All of the stories are not my problem.

If you are bored, the link is worth the bizarre read. For instance, Dead Baby Wakes Up for His Funeral Wake.

(Chicago Tribune’s review of “Did you Hear About the...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 22:16:00 -0600

(Chicago Tribune’s review of “Did you Hear About the Morgans?”)

Shocking.

Not my problem. Remember when Hugh Grant got with a transvestite prostitute? Yeah…

Ever since I was young, I was confused by the Big 10 because...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 22:06:18 -0600

Ever since I was young, I was confused by the Big 10 because there are actually 11 schools. And now they want to add 3 more that aren’t even in the Midwest?

Nmp. They should at least change the name.

You know you've done too much facebook stalking when...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 21:55:51 -0600

You can point out who your “friends” with self-esteem issues are. You can easily spot them because they:

Like to post pictures of themselves in bikinis (And they’re sucking in. duhs).
The have over 50 different profile pictures of just them (And they usually look very different from when you see them normally in sweats).
ALL of their profile pictures are of them and their significant other. No solo shots.

Ugh, not my problem. Now I remember why I hate facebook and took a hiatus- it’s for the annoying. Judge with me now!

Another crazy picture of Hugh Jackman’s daughter. Not my...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 20:41:58 -0600

Another crazy picture of Hugh Jackman’s daughter. Not my problem.

Cute wild child

ihatemyparents: houbi: Eindelijk werd me duidelijk waarom mijn...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 19:15:39 -0600

ihatemyparents:

houbi:

Eindelijk werd me duidelijk waarom mijn vrouw altijd zo’n hevig tegenstandster van stoepkrijt in huis was.

I think this translates to: I hate my parents.

Revenge is sweet. Not my problem.

Again, this is probably old news, but I thought facebook got rid...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 19:06:33 -0600

Again, this is probably old news, but I thought facebook got rid of networks for more privacy. I spent all of last night looking at people with closed profiles’ photo albums, tagged pictures, profile pictures…because I can.

Your plan backfired: not my problem.

A (long and whiny) personal story: I haven’t posted on...

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 19:00:51 -0600

A (long and whiny) personal story:

I haven’t posted on here lately because life was surprisingly great until last night (I’m being dramatic). Last night my friends and I went to see Metric at the Cubby Bear in Wrigleyville. First of all, I am never excited to go to that bar because it is very broish/fratastic. On my 21st birthday, I was extremely drunk, but I recall walking in, taking a look around, and then walking right out.

Anyways, the concert was scheduled to start at 9pm last night, according to our tickets and on all the websites listing the concert. When we get there, we were told the concert started at midnight. I don’t blame the band, I blame the promoters. If this was a marketing ploy to get people into that shitty bar to drink more while waiting (read: make more money) then they can go f themselves. It was bad enough to go to that bar in the first place, but to wait around for 3 hrs was ridiculous. Then the band didn’t go on until 12:15 am.

Let this be a lesson to everyone, never go to a concert at the Cubby Bear in Wrigleyville. Don’t let this be your problem! Not only did the band go on way later then supposedly scheduled, but the venue was awful. The sound was not up to par (blasting music as loud as possible does not a good concert make) and there were at least 6 columns in the small space (hello obstructed view). How is this bar a music venue? Other than that, Metric put on a great show.

Also, some guy asked me if I had pot twice, so apparently I look like a druggie? I’ve never done drugs (DARE, guys, DARE)- not my problem. Don’t let the Cubby Bear be your problem. You have been warned!

I may be late on this, but

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 00:45:48 -0600

Have you heard about TLC’s new show “Little Chocolatiers”? It’s another show about little people who (obviously) make chocolate. TLC enjoys exploiting little people and couples who have too many children: not my problem.

A non PC side of me makes me think that they had Willy Wonka in mind when making this show, which is very wrong. We get it- there are little people in this world who have “normal” lives like everyone else.

Tiger Woods’ (alleged) nudes put him in ranks of good old...

Mon, 14 Dec 2009 01:45:20 -0600

Tiger Woods’ (alleged) nudes put him in ranks of good old Vanessa Hudgens. And he could have joined Levi Johnston. Not my problem. Tragic.

He wins for shittiest week ever/loser of the week.

Ugh (these) men. Not my problem. I’m single and alone.

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 17:05:44 -0600

Ugh (these) men. Not my problem.

I’m single and alone.

zomg no: REPORT: NeNe Leakes & Kim Zolciak Fired From Real Housewives of Atlanta?

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 16:58:53 -0600

zomg no: REPORT: NeNe Leakes & Kim Zolciak Fired From Real Housewives of Atlanta?:

Not my problem. They’ll probably get their own show. Reality tv is unhealthy.

From an ad for the new season of Keeping up with the...

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 16:56:29 -0600

From an ad for the new season of Keeping up with the Kardashians. No offense to pregnant women everywhere, but Kourtney Kardashian- that’s just wrong.

not my problem. Their show is my guilty pleasure, but sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with them.

I legitimately thought this felon was John Mayer until I looked...

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 16:12:39 -0600

I legitimately thought this felon was John Mayer until I looked closer. If you see this man, do not call him John Mayer, he goes by The Professor. You look like a convicted felon/your face looks like John Mayer: not my problem.

Now lets sing a song with lyrics explicitly about getting stoned that little girls everywhere are going to lurrrrve.

Last night, I decided to catch up on all the tumblrs that I...

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 16:00:28 -0600

Last night, I decided to catch up on all the tumblrs that I follow. I didn’t read tumblr for a week. It took me 5 hrs to get through 136 dashboard pages. Don’t let this be your problem! Don’t wait a week.

Every Thursday our local paper comes out, aka local gossip rag. ...

Fri, 11 Dec 2009 15:55:49 -0600

Every Thursday our local paper comes out, aka local gossip rag. This week someone had a refrigerator stolen from their house in the middle of the day. How do you miss that? Not my problem. Someone also drove a car into a house near me. I didn’t miss that.

Once again, a People screen shot. Is this a joke? Jessica...

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 21:18:00 -0600

Once again, a People screen shot.

Is this a joke? Jessica Simpson and the Billy Corgan that writes this bizarre blog? Not my problem.

The Simpson sisters are ruining Chicago music.

Old news, but Jake is the new bachelor. Could they have picked...

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 22:04:57 -0600

Old news, but Jake is the new bachelor. Could they have picked anyone more awkward and cheesy? Not my problem. I guess he fits the Bachelor role perfectly, though.

Why is this show still on the air? Only one out of thirteen couples is still together (and they’re not even married), and there was one very fucked up bachelor (Jason). Isn’t it obvious that the show is not successful? Not my problem. End it. I’d rather watch another season of Top Model.

Stuff white people like.

Bret Michaels’ current flavor of love: Jailbait. not my...

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 19:56:48 -0600

Bret Michaels’ current flavor of love: Jailbait.

not my problem.

JUST BREATHE, guys.